When I Fall
by SingleMinded
Summary: "You need to choose one of them." When both their Lieutenants are down, the whole sentence is going to be the biggest burden to Boden, ever. One shot. Sevasey centric.


**Author's Note : I woke up in the middle of the night and suddenly I have the urge to write this. I know I'm not updating my previous story but I need to pen this out of my head. This is just random, no real plot, because I just need some hurt/comfort with Sevasey broment :) So here we go. A Sevasey one shot. English is not my language and I didn't use any beta reader for this so all mistakes are mine.  
**

**When I Fall**

It was just a usual call – a house fire – something they used to handle all the time. Nothing out of ordinary. The place was just around the neighbourhood so they managed to get there in three minutes.

The fire was just started and they could see white smoke out of every windows.

As he reached the house, Boden and both his lieutenants regrouped in front of the truck to discuss the next move when a woman approached them in hurry.

"Can I help you, mam?"

"I'm the one who call. The house should be empty at this hour but they have a teenage boy who sometimes comes home early from school. I didn't see him around so I'm afraid he's still in there."

"Thank you mam." Boden gave a signal to Herrmann to take her to the safe area.

"Casey, you take the ground search, Severide, upstairs."

"On it, Chief!" both said in unison.

Both team scattered into the house to their exceptional tasks. Severide moved slowly, leading the squad into each room when the smoke was getting thicker by the moment.

"Fire department! Call out!" he shouted, searching the last room.

Satisfied that there was no victim anywhere, he went downstairs with the team, thinking to help Casey if needed. They met halfway into the hallway.

"Found anything?" Severide's voice sounded distant behind his mask.

Casey shrugged. "Nothing but something is not right. Smoke's everywhere but I couldn't find the source." As he said that, his eyes noticed how the smoke was getting thicker around their legs when it shouldn't.

"Hidden basement?" it was more a statement than a question. Severide nodded, agreeing the thought.

They started to search for the door and when they found it, Casey sighed. _No wonder I couldn't find it before._

The door looked a lot like the wall – more like a secret door to the basement. The knob was more likely a key holder than its real function.

"Chief, we found a door to the basement. Severide and I will take a quick look." Casey radioed the Chief.

"Okay, three minutes at most. The smoke looks worse." A concerned tone could be heard in Boden's voice.

Casey nodded as Severide opened the door. That was when they felt the real heat. The basement was already on fire. But that was not the only thing caught their eyes, it was everything else in the basement. It was so big and metal scraps were everywhere in every possible sizes.

Severide looked at his partner, sharing a worried glance. It was impossible to do the search and rescue in three minutes. Hell, ten minutes would not be enough. All the scraps would be in the way.

"Should we?" there's hesitation in Casey's voice.

"Until Boden says retreat."

Both nodded, stepping their foot on the wooden stairs – with Severide led the way.

Severide made a few more steps further when he felt the stairs started shaking. "Damn, back out! Back out!"

But it was too late. The stairs gave away, bringing down both of them to the ground.

…

Boden looked at the front door, frowning in concern. Everybody was outside, except for his two lieutenants and Capp.

"Severide, report." He tried to be calm as much as he could. But the radio just gave out a noise.

"Casey, report!" his voice was firm this time.

"Anybody!"

"Chief! The stairs gave away! They are down!" Capp's voice rang through the radio. Everybody heard and getting back into their gear.

"Damn it boys." Chief swore before reaching his own gear.

"Herrmann, take a team with me." He shouted out orders and ran inside.

The first thing he saw was Capp, squatting down behind the basement door. Pass alarms were heard, making noises to the entire house.

Capp looked up, meeting his eyes. But the expression on the squad member's face sent a chill down his spine.

"What is it Capp?" he didn't wait for any answer as he slipped behind the door to see with his own eyes. Herrmann and Otis also managed to get in – each was taking place beside their Chief.

"Oh my god." That was the only words heard from Herrmann and none from the other three.

Down below, under a pile of metal scraps, two unmoving bodies lying on their side – side by side, pass alarms ringing out loud, one broken mask abandoned not far away but the worse of all, they were stuck together by a long metal rod in one single stroke.

…

"Otis, get Mills and Mouch! Herrmann, give me the rope, I'm going down."

As soon as his foots stepped on the floor, Boden crouched down to pull some of the metal scraps away from his men before reaching for each neck to feel the pulse. Both were not so good but at least they were alive.

Now as he could see them closer, he studied the surrounding. Casey still had his mask with him so his face was not visible but there were blood dripping down slowly from his temple. While behind him – unmasked – Severide was lying so still, his face pale with blood running down his nose and lips. He also noticed the pool of blood under both of them – which was slowly becoming wider.

And the metal rod, it was in a weird shape. From the look of it, it was impossible to cut it safely without creating any further injuries to his lieutenants. Behind him, Herrmann, along with Otis, Mills, Capp and Mouch, all reached the basement safely. Mouch and Otis moved further inside to control the fire.

Mills didn't waste any more time as he kneeled carefully beside Casey, pulling the mask away to check for injuries before changing place to look at Severide. As he patched them up, he was thinking and his face looked worried. Boden didn't miss the look and his patience was getting thinner.

"Speak up Mills."

"I… I think it's impossible to move them without pulling this out of one of them."

"What do you mean?" Boden made sure his voice was in check. Because somehow, he knew what will be said next.

"You need to choose one of them."

…

"Do you have any idea…" The words died on his lips. Boden gritted his teeths, clenching his hands. He couldn't believe of what he heard. It was like Mills was asking him to kill one of his best boys ever.

"Chief, I'm sorry." Mills looked down, thinking that this was going to be his fault.

After a few moments, Boden exhaled. "Okay, tell me again. What make you think that?"

"Just look at the rod, it's impaling them at the same spot and it is likely hit their arteries. We can't move them both because that will take more time and they don't have that. If we cut it in the middle, it will be too short and the risk of them both to lose more blood is high. The only solution is we pull one of them out of the way so we can take the other with the impaled rod to the hospital." He was silent for a while before continued. "Severide. I think we are losing him. They both hit an artery but he's already losing a lot of blood. Casey has a better chance to survive this because he's not yet bleed out. If we pull him from the rod now, his chance will be gone and we will lose them both."

"So you say, we pull Severide, let him bleed out and save Casey?" Boden said. His lips are trembling. _This is too much._ "That's crazy," he heard Herrmann's slow voice behind.

"He still has chance even if it's small. But it's better than jeopardizing both of them." Mills still couldn't believe his own words. Tears were pooling around his eyes.

Boden looked at both Herrmann and Capp. Capp looked angry but he didn't say anything to stop them.

After a quick thinking, Boden nodded slowly to Herrmann and Capp. Both sighed but moved along with the plan. They made a fast preparation. As they were about to pull Severide from the metal rod, a hand stopped them.

…

Casey was awake. He heard everything but he was too weak to do anything until he felt that they were about to _kill_ his best friend and he couldn't let that happened. He tried his best to reach behind and managed to grab Severide's rough jacket.

Herrmann looked shockingly at the hand. "Casey…"

"Stop… stop it…" Casey's voice was just a whisper.

Boden stepped closer, kneeling beside his truck lieutenant. "Casey, we need to do this."

"No. Save him…"

"Casey…" Boden tried again but this time his words cut with a harsh tone.

"I said safe him!" His grip was getting harder on Severide's jacket. Casey's face contorted in pain as he let out a small cough.

Boden gulped, he didn't know what to do. But the pleading eyes before him were so hard to deny.

"Please… save him. Don't do this… He's my friend…" Casey's voice quivered. "Don't give up on him… please…"

And for the first time ever, the team saw him crying. Herrmann and Capp just looked at each other – feeling helpless.

Boden inhaled and exhaled a long breath. He didn't know if this was the right decision but he knew he couldn't win this – not with the pleading. Whatever happened next, it was all on him.

Rubbing his face with both hands, he silently gave them permission.

"Thank you." Casey mouthed the words.

Herrmann and Capp changed their position, carefully trying to do the whole thing smoothly. Again, they did a quick preparation but this time it was going to be harder since Casey was awake.

"Damn it…" a small curse heard from Mills. His hand was not leaving Severide's neck – constantly feeling the pulse.

"Why. What happened?" Casey asked weakly.

"I think he's going into shock soon." Mills said, everyone's face were going pale.

"Herrmann, now!" Casey said, gathered all his small strength to be ready.

"Okay, on three. 1, 2… 3!"

Casey thought he was prepared enough. But as they pull him off the metal, it was the most unexpected pain he ever had – it was unbearable. He couldn't help but scream a loud cry as he grimaced in pain. Everything after that became blur. He didn't know when they both were brought up and out of the house. He could see people moving around him, distantly hearing people calling their names. He felt weaker and weaker, like all strength drained out of him along with his blood.

Herrmann was holding his hand but some unfamiliar face was taking care of his injuries. As a mask appeared to cover his face, he glanced to his right.

_Kelly…_

From the corner of his eyes, he could see Mills were trying desperately to save their friend before they pushed him inside the ambulance.

And everything went black.

…

A couple of voices having conversation stirred him up. Besides, the beeping sound was loud and far too close but then, the smell was too familiar.

_Hospital._

He tried to open his eyes but he was not ready for the bright light to shield his vision. He grimaced, closing his eyes again.

"Kelly?" It was Boden as he felt a strong hand gripping his right arm. As soon as he felt the touch, all his senses was coming back – the itching tube under his nose, the too many wires resting on his chest and a sharp pain with a weird cramp on his torso.

"Ughh…" he groaned. His throat felt dry.

"No! Don't touch it. Just let it be. It's just bandage." Boden's another fast hand stopped his moving hand – which he didn't even realize moved – before he touched the bandages.

Slowly, he tried to open his eyes again and succeed.

"Lakeshore?" he whispered. Boden nodded.

"Hey lieutenant." Another familiar voice welcomed him. _Mills. _He didn't even aware of the junior existence.

"Hey." Just a raspy voice came out as reply. Boden handed him a glass of water which he welcomed so much.

The room went silent as two sets of eyes watching him drinking the water.

"You remember what happened?" Boden asked carefully, taking the empty glass from Severide and placed it back on the table.

"Vaguely. I remember the call. I remember going down the basement with Casey and… Oh my god! Casey! Is he okay?" He jolted upright, grimacing in pain as the sudden move cramped his torso a lot more.

"Hey easy, easy." Boden pushed the lieutenant back to the bed. "He's okay. He's still out and pretty much banged up like you but he's okay." Boden said but didn't take his hand off the shoulder.

The whole move was small but it sure took a toll on Severide. He looked tired, right hand unconsciously gesturing the uneasy pain around his torso. Boden sighed as he stood up.

"I think you should rest. I'll call the doctor." He walked to the door but as the chief moved pass Mills, Severide didn't miss the exchange glance and the look they shared but his mind was too tired to think about it.

_I'll ask next time._ He vowed silently as he closed the eyes.

…

The next time he was awake, the sight of nearly the whole house welcomed him. He didn't know what the doctor gave him last time but he was out the whole night and thankfully, he felt better as the cramp was gone today.

"Don't you guys have your shift?" he said groggily, trying to lie down higher with Mills' help. The pain was still there but it was manageable.

"Just finished it. It's been five days. You missed three shifts already." Herrmann said, patting the patient's leg.

"Five days?" Severide couldn't hide the shock in his voice. He didn't know he had miss that much. "Casey?"

"He's waking up. And don't you ever think about it. You can see him later after you're good enough to go." Boden said, already cut the next question before Severide could even say it. Everyone in the room could clearly see the frustration displayed in his eyes but nobody dare to say anything.

They spent almost half an hour in the room, talking and laughing about random things. Severide just enjoyed the meaningful – albeit tiring – morning. It was so noisy – they even received a warning from a nurse – until everybody left except Boden and Mills.

The room went silent for a moment. Severide sighed.

"Okay now spill it." He said, eyes darting to his chief and fellow friend. Both of them looked at him in defeat.

Boden moved closer and instead of sitting on the provided chair, he sat carefully at the edge of the bed. Severide frowned. His attention changed from Boden to Mills. Mills just stood at the end of the bed, looking nervous and then he realized, the kid never looked at him in the eyes for the whole visit.

"Kelly, we want to apologize. I want to apologize."

"For what?"

"For giving up on you."

…

Strange feeling woke him up – like somebody was watching him asleep. His weary eyes could shape up a human frame in the semi dark room. It wasn't until a few seconds that he could figure out who it was.

"Kelly?" He couldn't contain the happiness in his voice. A smile formed on his lips.

"Hey." The same joy verbalised in Severide's voice.

"Oh my god, you're really okay."

"Well, kind of." Severide chuckled as he gestured the IV pole that kept him company. Just then, Casey realized that his friend was still in hospital dress.

"They kept saying that you're okay but they won't let me see you." A ping of sadness drew on Casey's face.

"Me too." Severide inhaled and exhaled a long breath, thinking about the right words to say.

"Hey man, Boden told me everything. A part of me, I'm so mad at you. But another part, I'm so grateful of what you did." Severide said, his lips are trembling with mixed emotions. Casey went silent, absorbing the whole reactions coming out of his friend.

"Thank you. Thank you for not giving up on me. You save my life." Slowly, he grabbed Casey's arm – squeezing a little – showing his full gratitude.

"No, man. What they were going to do, I couldn't bear living with it. You save my life too."

Kelly nodded. He slumped back into the chair. Casey sat up a little, trying to take a closer look at his friend.

"You look tired. It's in the middle of the night. Aren't you supposed to rest at this hour?" Casey frown. He knew something was not right.

"Well, I asked the nurse nicely and they let me see you for…"

"Oh for God sake! Here you are!" Suddenly a loud voice made Severide cringed. A middle age woman – clearly a nurse – and a hospital attendant was standing at the door with a wheelchair.

"Young man! If you're going to run away from your room, just never do that under my watch, do you understand?!" the nurse was now standing in front of Severide while the firefighter just cringed a lot more, trying to avoid the angry stare from her.

Casey just lying there agape, witnessing the whole scene – not believing of what had just happened.

When both nurse and hospital attendant managed to wheel his friend out of the room, Casey sank back into the pillow, chuckling at his friend's antic. But still, he couldn't help thinking about what happened. Severide will never remember because he was out the whole time but it was going to be a fixed memory in his head for the rest of his life.

_But at least you are okay._

He smiled.

**THE END.**

**Yeah, too sappy. I know :D But please review. Thank you for reading.  
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